Just Gotta Say...

Not much time to write much at all since Matt took off, but I need to comment that every time I go into Gabe's room to feed him at night, I nearly pass out from the stink. He has the nastiest farts in the history of mankind, excluding only his father and perhaps the involuntary functions of a rotting, bloated corpse. And this special fog seems to escape and congregate around the crib at night. I don't have proof, but I'm getting suspicious, Gabey! No offense kid, but pew!

Come On, People...

Ok- I dearly love the people that have sent me these silly things. That is not even a question. But puhleeze! Cay you guys be serious? Until someone near and dear to me calls me up, holding a check, my common sense is just going to have to dominate and call this a complete scam! I'm quite surprised y'all don't agree! How many others have received these forwards in their email inboxes? (Again, I love you girls, but please tell me y'all sent this as some sort of joke or something! If I'm wrong I promise to publicly eat my words, but how can you even hope there is ANY truth to these things? -And P.S.- Wouldn't you expect to see these beautiful checks all over the news? I really don't want anyone to be offended- so please don't hate me. I just am very confused.)

"Subject: FW: PLEEEEEEEEASE REEEEEAD! IT WAS ON GOOD MORNING AMERICA TODAY SHOW

Read carefully...

THIS TOOK TWO PAGES OF THE TUESDAY USA TODAY - IT IS FOR REAL



To all of my friends, I do not usually forward messages,

But this is from my friend Pearlas Sandborn and she really is

an attorney.


If she says that this will work - It will work. After all,What have

you got to lose?


SORRY EVERY BODY.. JUST HAD TO TAKE THE CHANCE!!! I'm an

attorney, And I know the law. This thing is for real. Rest assured

AOL and &nbs p; Intel will follow through with their promises for

fear of facing a multimillion-dollar class action suit similar to the one

filed by PepsiCo against General Electric not too long ago.



Dear Friends: Please do not take this for a junk letter.

Bill Gates sharing his fortune. If you ignore this, You will repent

later.



Microsoft and AOL are now the largest Internet companies

and in an effort to make sure that Internet Explorer remains the

most widely used program, Microsoft and AOL are running an e-mail

beta test.



When you forward this e-mail to friends, Microsoft can and will

track it (If you are a Microsoft Windows user) For a two weeks

time period.



For every person that you forward this e-mail to, Microsoft will pay

you $245.00 For every person that you sent it to that forwards it on,

Microsoft will pay you $243.00 and for every third person that receives

it, You will be paid $241.00. Within two weeks, Microsoft will contact

you for your address and then send you a check.



Regards. Charles S Bailey General Manager Field Operations

1-800-842-2332 Ext. 1085 or 904-1085 or RNX 292-1085





Thought this was a scam myself, But two weeks after receiving this

e-mail and forwarding it on. Microsoft contacted me for my address and

within days, I received a check for $24, 800.00 . You need to respond

before the beta testing is over. If anyone can afford this, Bill gates is the

man.



It's all marketing expense to him. Please forward this to as many

people as possible. You are bound to get at least $10, 000.00

We're not going to hel p them out with their e-mail beta test without

getting a little something for our time. My brother's girlfriend got in

on this a few months ago. When I went to visit him for the Baylor/UT

game, she showed me her check. It was for the sum of $4,324.44 and

was stamped 'Paid In Full'.

Still Holding the Apple

Rainy Day Pictures

Splish Splash!

Boys, don't play by the fire pit.

Boys, don't play by the fire pit.

I told you not to play by the fire pit.

Notice where his feet are in relation to pavers that surround the fire pit. This was snapped the instant he entered the pond. And it was BLOODY FREEZING water, about 18 inches deep in the center. I threw myself into the water, holding the camera in the air with one arm and pulling my baby out with the other. By the time he was out, he had already breathed in a huge breath of yucky nasty water and was too frozen and stunned and suffocated to breathe! I held him in as much contact with my own body as possible and ran with him toward the house, pulling his sopping shoes and socks off and screaming for Jes and Nolan to come inside behind me. Poor little Gabe didn't finally inhale until we reached the house, where I stripped him at lightning speed and ran him to the bathtub to put him in some warm water. The poor boy was shocked beyond belief and panicking a bit, but after a minute he choked all the water out of his lungs and took to enjoying his bath. And finally I exhaled.
P.S.- Up until the moment I took this picture I'd been guarding the pit, while Gabey tried to get past me. Then Jes walked up beside Gabe and I thought, You're so freaking paranoid, Donna! You can take a step back to snap a bloody picture. What's he gonna do, walk strait into the water?

Parties on the Potty

I found some time to email the folks about what's up lately, and I don't have time to rewrite it so I'm just pasting a copy here. Enjoy!

First, we got "GrandmaGrandpa" box #1 a few minutes ago, so thank you! It was (as always) a big hit. Jesse was surprisingly patient as I gave each boy his own items. Gabe was too lazy to finish unwrapping his water toy so he was just playing with it through the hole in the tissue paper. No problem, Jesse was more than willing to help. Jes wanted to play with it but I told him it was Gabey's, and strangely he gave it back and returned to his own gifts. What a good boy!
And now, here are a couple of Jesse's latest stunts that I found amusing:

After we finished unloading the goodies and J had given everything a satisfactory examination, he asked where his stool was and wandered off looking for it. I watched him out of the corner of my eye and shouted to him, "What are you doing, Jes?" There was some hesitation, and then a quiet, "...somepin'..." So I asked again, louder this time, "What are you doing, Jes?" Then came the much stronger response, "Nothin'!" I listened closely and heard a victorious, but whispered, "Sharps!" (meaning scissors) so I told him to put them back, and he wasn't happy but he complied and went on a search for his own sharps (the plastic pincher things from a used doctor's kit he got for Christmas- best dollar I ever spent). I insisted he clean up the three bins of toys in the front room and after that I would help him find his sharps. With a little coaxing he was done in no time and I got the pinchers for him, not even really thinking about what he wanted them for. Turned out he just wanted to open another box that had arrived in the mail with the first one. It was just a replacement inflatable punching bag for the one that came with his boxing kit. Anyway I found it remarkable that he patiently went through all those steps and stayed focused on his goal of opening the box. His mind seems to develop at the speed of light.

This morning we sang Popcorn Popping on the Apricot Tree (always a hit) and then launched into Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes, and every time I finished the "toes" part, Jes would insert, "AND PENIS!" Apparently I was leaving out the most important part. Pardon me.

Last night I had heard some snipit of something interesting from Sean Hannity and I missed the rest, so while the kids ate I logged on to find out what I missed. Jes climbed up beside me and pointed to Hannity's picture and said, "What's that?" so I told him, "That's Sean Hannity," and he's all, "Sean Hantie?" I told him, "That's right," and he asked a million more times and of course got the same answer. Then I opened my email and for the next hour at least,-well beyond the time I finished with the computer- he kept asking me, "Where Sean Hantie go?" It was hilarious! This, he can pronounce after hearing it for the first time. But when it's time to be held? Well he needs a "Fwa."

A bit ago he finished using the potty and while I wiped him and for five minutes afterward he pranced around the house, triumphantly singing, "Pooooooo chocolate, Poooooooooo chocolate!" [That's his term for the Little Debbie treats he gets when he goes #2 on the potty. I should mention, too, that I haven't changed a dirty diaper of his since maybe a week ago, on the first day he wore "Big boy underpants like Daddy's." Awesome!]

As I was writing this J, was sitting at the table eating the last of the Cheese Nips, and when he'd polished them off he looked in the box and said so casually, "Crackers all gone. Mama eat 'em all." What the crap?!!!! I had a total of like 8 since the thing was opened! Ughhh! Not lovin' his new habit of blaming me for all food consumption. Seriously, kid...

Jes also has a fascination with the "pocket" as he calls it, it the front of his big boy underwear. I told him what it's for and he decided to - uh...(guess I'll just say it) pull "it" through the "pocket" and proceed to sit down and try to pee. Um, not quite, kid. Perhaps I didn't explain it right; now what? In the end I told him to forget the pocket; his dad could teach him about it when he gets home.

Oh, and the water toy you sent for Gabe? Not a water toy at all. J's playing with it while G's sleeping, and it turns out the toy is actually a train. Chugga-choo-choo sound effects and all, as it rides the perimeter of the coffee table.

That's about it for now I guess!

Here Ya Go, Daddy!

Jesse's so proud of his Lincoln Log house!

Every once in a while I forget to pop the flash up and for whatever reason I end up with a bunch of blurry shots like these. Sometimes ditziness is a pain in my butt!

I get about 35,000,000 of these hugs everyday. He throws his head sideways and bends at the waist, plunking that sweet noggin on my lap. (I'm reclining in this picture- you'll notice the bump of my poor, maimed abdomen.) This is his way of making up with me when I scold him,
before returning to the misbehavior that just got him in trouble.
He also gives these out just to say "I love you" fairly frequently. So Sweet.

More hugs.

Hugging again.

Excuse the knees- he pulled the end of my skirt up to the Mormon version of slutty-length.